My husband rose to the challenge and came up with a list for the men of the family(do you hear all that womanly applause from my audience Doug?).
Some of these are true originals and others are borrowed from that funny person out there!
DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.
STEVE: What you call your child when you can’t remem…ber their name.
GRANDPARENTS: The people who send you stuff that you don’t need or want. See JUNK.
IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.
SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.
TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.
TWO MINUTE WARNING: when the baby’s face turns red and he/she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
VERBALIZE: able to whine in words.
PEPPERONCINI:How a certain daddy introduces his babies to solid food.